A song for you....

simplifying the complexity

Hmmm....I didnt think of visiting my blog today but someone had left a comment on an old post and that brought me here. Interesting, how I deviate from my plans, how I just put aside those dirty dishes on my kitchen sink and devote some time to my blog. Well, not that I dont like to write err blog...I rather like to be consistent about my writing as I nurture my dream to have my own book, a bestseller. People who read my blog tell me that I write well, that I kinda can weave things and its interesting. Recently my big brother went through my blog and read some of the posts and he even recommended me to start writing on a particular genre, I am glad, I am happy and these words of appreciation inspire me to write more, to create more, to weave more with my words. Yes, words...

Things are going crazy lately, life is so hectic that I am losing count of days and how its already mid November and I have no idea its just feels yesterday I was thinking about going to the mountains to beat the summer heat in Delhi. Hmmm, truly, time indeed flies...You know, you are lucky to get this feeling as this means things are going good...and you are going with the flow...I remember one friend saying this one day. Yes, I am grateful that things are all good, li'l hectic and tiring but its all good, as they say in NYC.

Talking about pace, speed, life's ongoing string of things, and in the midst of all these madness I sometimes think its good to have no format, no pattern and its fun to be spontaneous, and be there for that moment. Its good sometimes to have no plans...or the way the ultimate 'virgo' in me would put: its ok not to follow the plans! Well, I really dont know, whats good and what's not...as end of the day if I can flash that smile which you call bewitching, I am happy with that. If at the end of the day I can fall asleep next to you, I am happy with that. If at the end of the day that funny, non-descriptive curry I churn out in my new kitchen tastes like thousand bucks, I am happy. Actually, its really a simple thing to be happy in life and I dont know why people choose a complex route for happiness. Anyway....

May be I should be asking this to myself...as I sometimes become such an epitome of perfection that things go really rigid, really structured and my scheme of things do look like a fortress...as if I am that super warrior with a no-non sense air...hmmm...

Well, I am good as long as I take time to point fingers at myself. No one is perfect, you see....

Talking about complexities, I do get bit worked up when things are not so simple around me, when things are unclear, when things around you give you doubts, when things around you make you think twice. I am sure it doesnt give you a good feeling, when in one hand you expect a bunch of roses but you are poked with thorns. Who like to have such surprises? Not me at the least.

I know roses are enchanting, beautiful and so ethereal... but I would rather appreciate those lanky stems of tuberoses. I like things simple, things which are clear...things which dont confuse you. Well....thats how I have been leading my life and I have no complaints. Its been awesome so far, its been a great ride so far, as I call it 'awesome lonesome' and I am really fortunate to have it shaping up this way. I am glad, thankful, all humbled!

Pink cloud indeed...

"The key to happiness is good health and short memory", so said Ingrid Bergman.

Hmm...I wish it could be that way for me too as I reminisce about an afternoon, those clouded, oh-so-very dreamy moments, when you don't need your eyes as if you are blinded, when it was just about the feelings - how you feel inside, how those touch feel, how those moments feel....hmmm...

It was as if you were on those pink clouds, literally, feeling an awesome high where head feels so light as if you could fly, when things happen like a dream and you wonder whether its magic or destiny.

And in that dark room, in that haze it felt so heavenly, it felt so dreamy, it felt so romantic. It was so strikingly different from its surrounding when sun was blazing and shining bright outside, without an iota of any cloud, without any hint of pink, where honking vehicles pass by and you wake up from your dream as you walk back home.

That was lovely, those whispers, those murmurs, those unopened eyes and yet there was a beautiful conversation, in all awareness, in all life and blood, in all its passion and love.

Have you ever fed a baby who is half asleep? Its that kinda feeling and I liked my 'pink cloud' moments with a baby half awake half asleep that afternoon.

Scaping-scope

"In love, if you are looking for someone new, consider taking a drive into the countryside to view the brilliant fall foliage in early October. You never know - the handsome stranger picking apples next to you may be someone you'll want to know better. Venus and her lover Mars will make a rare and sparkling conjunction on October 3, scattering radiant romantic vibrations all over your chart. For you, love happens when on a short trip away from home, so go ahead - give in!"

Hmm...this is what Virgo horoscope read for the month of October.

And how true! I did go on a short trip..well, for two weeks. And I did go apple picking. Fall weather was lovely and I did love everything about it. Moving about among the greens on a sunny day doing some girl-talk with a friend was romantic indeed. So, in nutshell, words in horoscope are all true if you just consider the words. Amazing.

September chronicle!

Septembers have been always special. Its my month, my birth month to be specific.

A month full of activities, highs and lows, joys and confusions, it indeed is a memorable month. Here I am reminiscing about a month so hectic, so packed, so tiring, so full of food, friends and fun just before a voyage...err..I am setting off for yet another trip.

October will be different, I am sure. For its gonna be a different month, a different time, in a different terrain, different temperature....also so different. My mind is full of Pacific Ocean and Rocky Mountain!

I am all set for watching fabulous sunsets by the Pacific and see moon rise over Rocky Mountain with a nice nice cocktail by my side. I have that nice cocktail dress from Paris sitting pretty in my suitcase and I surely haven't forgotten that sexy stilettos. I am sure life at 35th floor would be pretty exciting too. Umm...I am all set for some amazing time!

Adios and see you soon! Life has been a roller coaster ride and I ain't complaining.

Eat Pray Love 2010

Till some months ago I only considered 'eat', and 'sleep' as two most important aspects of my life. That was until when I held Eat Pray Love in my hands and embraced ...umm....well...and became inseparable.

Yes, yes, I know what you will say, and I would still say 'eat' and 'sleep' were two most important things in this nomad's life when travel is so much part of life. And traveling or not traveling, my life revolved around food and more food and lots of sleep. You know, sleep is kind of a therapy in my life, it rejuvenates me, it renews me...ha ha ...now you know what keeps me all so energetic, happy and giggly.

Well, coming to talk about Eat Pray Love, I never knew a simple looking book could be so very life changing, addictive....or may be I fell prey ...or may be it was the weak, vulnerable side in me that could relate or forced 'me' to relate to what the protagonist (and also the writer) was going through. I still don't know, and I don't want to know either. But one thing is very clear, EPL ..I mean the book did affect me, my surroundings (read: friends). And I am amazed how most often my friends from far and near would see EPL trends in my activities, and when I have read/re-read the book a good three months back. I never knew any other book I recommended to my friends had been so popular. Anyway...

Life goes on and one tends to move on. I know, I did have a cute lil thing going on with EPL this summer but didn't think it will be so very indelible.. (umm...talking about things indelible, I want to have a few cute li'l tattoos!)..

I actually did an EPL ...well, EPL inspired trip. It's just an old habit and I had to take a break and sniff some coffee..err ...see some different faces, smell some different air and go under another cloud and get drenched in another place. Well, you got it, a change of place of sorts when life gets hectic when you don't get any creative in what you are passionate about and then you know its time to wander about and charge those batteries! Well, not literally...

I have been happily finding my groove in a new setting (you still call it new? well...) and I 'almost' found my niche and life looked pretty sorted. And here's where the nomad in me gets scared and starts throwing tantrums and that's something I haven't learnt to ignore. So, I had to sit back and listen to the nomad in me and decided to give it a shot when my love affair with sun was getting just so unbearable in the heart of the city. The practical me found out that it was almost eight long months since 'we' had gone for a vacation!

Yeh, we were at EPL, and explaining how my three city tour turned out to be my EPL or I had an EPL inspired trip....

However happy-go-lucky I look on the surface there exists a serene, tough, rather meticulous core. And a well planned, logical tour plan was charted out. And this girl loves to meet people (you think she's a loner, eh?), she simply loves people around her...Oh'yeah!

And I have an uncanny knack of packing a lot of things in a tiny bag...I mean, I have this tendency and this makes me feel good as if it 'is' the mandate to be doing things more efficiently, cost effectively, even if it means hopping to four different cities in less than ten days! Well, my friend 'Lonely Planet' knows this so very well that whenever I share an itinerary before a tour, he would mockingly say there's still room for at least two cities. I know, I know...this is incorrigible..Dont you know, there are somethings we know about ourselves and yet we cannot do or rather do no do anything about it. I mean, these are my traits, I am who I am...and having a hectic itinerary or a laid back spa holiday, I like it the way I want it!

So, with EPL, people (read: friends, super sexy ones at that!), hectic itinerary and tour planning, I found myself hopping from Delhi to Hyderabad on a very nice, romantic weekend...umm...I love country side and that train ride through those meadows, looking at the blue sky by a huge window in an air conditioned compartment as clouds played hide and seek with me, I was transported to a different world altogether. I love the feeling, the feeling so very me, so very passionate, so very deep.... And to make things interesting it is important to mention that my visit to the city of four pillars "Charminar" coincided with Ramadan and which translates to lot of feasting after fasting. So, my 'eat' part of the journey was made.

It has become a practice of sorts now, every time I cross the Vindhyas, I have to meet Him. And Tirupati- the holy city became my next stop after satiating my taste buds and after loading all the chambers of my stomach with aromatic preparations from the city of nawabs.

After some heavy duty trekking and very nice godly time and soul searching, it was time to move to part III of the tour, the love part. And if you are heading south on the East Coast in India, and looking for some leisure, Pondy hits you bang on. Yeah! you got it bang on, baby. I am talking about Pondicherry, with those cobbled streets and French Quarters, with that Bussy street which indeed a busy street and with that canal that cuts the city into halves and runs from its head to toe...well, almost literally! Ahh...I almost sounded as if I am describing Pondy at its anatomy....hmmm...

And then suddenly I realized (kinda eureka moment) I just planned my EPL however short it is, however local it could get, nonetheless, it was my EPL as I ended up eating a lot, praying some more and totally fell in love...ummm....

I didnt know it would still be so nostalgic and lingering....but I accept, I was, I am hit by EPL big time. And EPL did hit me...as I did eat, I did pray and I did love it! And there's love .....ummm....

Quote-Unquote

"I have heard of reasons manifold
Why Love must needs be blind,
But this the best of all I hold,—
His eyes are in his mind."

Samuel Taylor Coleridge (1772-1834)

Brew that grew....

Brew...the word sounds interesting, the sound of it simply!

So, whats brewing? Well, a lot of stuff is happening in my head. There is a lot of things brewing in my mind and they are kinda growing...urghh...

Wish I had loads of time to download...err draft what all my mind has been brewing. I get these sudden urges to jot down my thoughts, nice ideas, intense feelings, all oozing out of me and ready to pour out .....

Umm...there are a lot of things I wish to publish....I surely want to see them published, in front of my eyes, in front of your eyes and its just that its just not time yet...Waiting for the right time. My thoughts are ripening within me...

I am brimming with ideas, my mind brewing my thoughts.....

Coming to a Full Circle-II

I remember writing one post earlier by the same name on this blog, so this one becomes ‘part II’ without having any continuity or relation. Now, coming to what I wanted to tell you…

I was perplexed at the complexity, at the multiple layers life could wear, at the different situations life presented to me and this led to some deep thinking to understand about life. Well, I try all the time…

I love to contemplate, to analyze, to think, to think deep…and all of that…

I was to switch into travel mode, this time on work and I was looking forward to the trip. There are more than one reasons and I am happy at the end of the trip that my work was satisfactory and I am looking forward to the collaboration. And I returned home on the weekend kinda satisfied, kinda disturbed (that’s not related to work though) and wanted to relax and get some massage and things like that.

I did have a quiet weekend and managed to relax and also work on a tight deadline without a computer…whoa? Yes, without a computer, you read it right. And my story of suffering started.

Something was wrong with my computer which I could not fix myself and hence I went to an IT expert who also wasn’t of any help. I call this person incompetent straightaway. Well, I know some really smart IT chaps (you know, I am in India, and these IT guys are good!) and so arriving at a conclusion was easy for me even when I would not know anything more than basic computer technique myself.

So, you kinda picture my state of being. I am at work and not able to work as the most important tool was not working! By the way, this is about my office laptop and then I have my personal laptop sitting in one of those fancy shelves I have at work because it is also not working for past few weeks. Talking of problems and here I am…

Anyway, I find the right person and my problem with computers are sorted. So, I get back to work. I go back to prepare my notes for an impending lecture and I concentrate on my class. I feel good. Well, work makes me happy. And I also love teaching. So at the end of the day I feel nice and glad.

Have you ever wondered how powerful it is when you speak and others listen. It’s actually a very powerful position to be in. Hmm…

Here, my computers break down, I feel horrible. I have a great class, and I feel good. And at the same time a lot of different things are happening, which makes you nervous, anxious, jolly, and this and that. And it’s a complex thing. Sometimes, we don’t even respond to all these and focus on to one or two particular triggers/emotions.

That day, there was a birthday, there was a funeral, there was a plan for a weekend trip, there were happy faces I like to see (I like to see the smile again and again), there were distractions, there were phone calls from old friends (yes, two to be precise...and how uncanny, both were calling from the same city. Ouch! actually, one introduced to me to the other...Hmm...talking about connections!).

And here I remember one of my favorite lines, ‘there is more than one truth’, I like repeating in my classes when I tell them about qualitative research. And looking at life you wonder how true it is, how striking it is.

And then, there are truths which become ‘truths’ later, when people come back to you to tell you what they said last time and how they feel now. And at the end of the day I find solace reading some books and sipping some pomegranate juice. I felt happy at Full Circle this Friday. It rained and I liked those little raindrops on my unruly locks...umm...thats another story altogether.

Life does come to a full circle, again and again.

Pitter Patter

Hmm...I like the sound of it...no raindrops here for me but thats how my world gets filled with when I start to err...no, not work actually..but simply write. Hummmp...I am suddenly realizing the fact how computers have taken over our lives and how one day we will forget to write! Quite possible, I think so.

Last time I had written with a pen for hours together was in January,2009 which was well after 11 years I last sat for an exam. Well, I am from a time when exams were all in hand written mode. And believe me, I was so tired at the end of the session not because questions there were difficult to solve but because I had to use pen and paper instead. It was so taxing for me and especially when I was sitting for a competitive exam with people half my age. It was actually embarrassing, ask me how?

First, I was not one of the young participants and then I had trouble writing my answers and then I was the one who scored the least ( I am sure, though I did not get to know everyone's scores that afternoon.Well, that's just to explain how ill at ease I feel with pen and paper.

And coming to think of handwriting, its a shame when what we scribble simply remain undecipherable for others. I need to use the white board and marker pen in the class (yes, I teach, you guessed it right!) and often times its in addition to my presentation on the projection. I struggle to write legibly on the white board when once upon a time I would be called to write special notes in school for having good handwriting. Do you remember the times when there was special marks for having good handwriting?! Hmm...now if I go back I will score negative marks even after solving all the arithmetic!

Anyway, I have been talking about writing, updating my blog and here comes something about writing and on the blog. So, I am not that concerned after all for having bad handwriting! Shhh...the only time I write in a day, that too once on an average when I am required to put my signature. I am sure, thats the case for most people of my age these days. Ahhh...I also scribble with pencils when I do my to-do lists, thats like once a week.

So, given the amount of usage its pretty likely our generation would find writing redundant or may be an 'extinct' activity...err....something from the yore!
And I am laughing to myself as I am in an imaginary conversation with my kids (well, one day...) explaining to them what it is called writing...Well, lets see.