Ouch! Just going on for nose-dive…

I guess it is inevitable and I also knew its coming!

Yikes, I almost know how someone is reacting after reading this one sentence….Well, for your benefit Sir, I am explaining…so, don’t again say what you once said!!

I have been going through a very longish ‘high energy’ phase and it had to come to an end. It’s only normal. What is not normal is the erratic way it knocks me out. And I find me doomed in the middle of an important deadline and lose all my smartness and forget to flaunt my trademark smile (someone said ‘bewitching’) and for some reason get bogged down by the stare of that new-chick (I have a new term for her: ‘sophisticated-uncouth bitch’). I really hate when I am on such a sticky wicket… (Ouch, what’s happening down under with these men in Blue, losing matches after matches!!? I was referring to T20 matches in New Zealand and the losing streak India is continuing with…See, I am explaining!)

I guess I know what’s been happening…I mean in my zone, in my life, that is.

I have been happily spreading thin and not realizing the after effect as my energy level was high. I was wondering the other day when I was ruminating on my energy spurts as if I had taken some dope. Seriously, I can go on a high without anything and behave in such a manner which could be so very similar to someone just high on, say, marijuana. But I am naturally like this. My happy ‘high’ phase is very high and it shows. You will notice that bang on, no mistaking my presence.

But what comes after that is a very sudden, out-of-control ‘doomed’ phase. And I feel so utterly sorry for this. I have been on a roller-coaster ride and suddenly when I park myself within some unknown shell it surprises everyone around me and I am so very ‘shelled’ that I don’t offer an explanation and I know it could be irksome.

But for the benefit of my friends around me I have issued an 'update' (oops, so sophisticated, who cares?); have you seen my FaceBook off late? I know, its irrational. It can be seen as an act of immature mind. But I just wanted such an ‘absolute-ME-time’ that I have to enter into my shell without mincing any more words. And I am telling this way on my blog so that you all know I have not been avoiding any of you. But I just needed to have me with me, just in my skin, in my raw self, in my emotions, in my tears and… and…

I hope you will help me get my me-time and I wish to give time to you (I wish to meet you, sorry for the goof up this weekend) and see you when I have that nice smile to compliment my new hairdo. I don’t want to effect you with my moods. I care for you.

And I remember a phrase which is so apt: ‘conserve energy’. I need to learn that, its high time I do. And I also remembered just in time to 'cut the details' for a story well said!!